Grars and hypes forever

I finally got to vote in the presidential primary today, and boy, am I exhausted. How much longer until November? I don’t know if I can stand it.

One good thing about this election cycle, though, is I got this great t-shirt:

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Of course I got food stains on it four hours after I took this photo this morning, but seeing as the shirt was designed by Mr. Let’s Paint, a man known for painting while riding a bicycle while making smoothies*, maybe those stains are meant to be there.

If you want your own great election shirt, greeting card, shower curtain or baby onesie, you can go here to order one and customize colors, sizes, and so on. I’m not getting paid to shill these; I just think this design is a pretty good depiction of this year’s democracy in action. USA!

*Also painting while running on a treadmill while playing chesspainting while shaving while riding a bikepainting while running on a treadmill while interviewing Eric Andre while baking cookies, etc.

Style and substance

I feel so late to the party. Before yesterday, I had no idea who Sandra Lee from the Food Network was. Apparently Sandra Lee is a woman who throws a lot of pre-made food together until it resembles something hilarious and then drinks a lot of cocktails so she can properly concentrate on making a fancy centerpiece for her table. I really can’t knock any of that. This is what my “quick and delicious dishes” category on the Notions is all about. Trader Joe’s wouldn’t exist if there weren’t drunken housewives who can’t admit that they hate cooking.

It’s just that the styling and the tone are all wrong. This would be the greatest show in the world if it were hosted by Francine Dancer with a public access television aesthetic – the “Steven Seagal: LAWMAN” of the Food Network. But I guess you already knew that.

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