Jung man, there’s no need to feel down

I guess I’m not unique in that I’ve been thinking about good men and bad men lately, and gender in general. Yesterday I read an essay by a man that pointed out:

“…no wonder many of us have failed to see grabby men as a serious social problem for women, when an American boyhood consists of little else but unorganized combat drills, unwanted invasions of personal territory. It’s all grabs, punches, towel flicks, fake homoerotic aggression, threats of unspecified but grim—and, as one ages—increasingly sexualized violence.”

and, well, I agree with that and also I don’t know what to do with that. And neither does the author, really. The essay is entitled “What Is It Like To Be A Man?” and one of the points is that being a man is confusing and tough if you are or want to be something other than a Man (whatever that means in this day and age), and also you feel guilty about even admitting things can be confusing or tough if you’re a man… because of a lot of things.

After I read the article, I read a very long comment thread about the article, and it was a surprisingly nuanced comment thread. At least I think it was. It got confusing for me. There was a lot of talk about hermeneutics, category exemplars, what one actually associates with Heidegger, and lots of other stuff that I never understand but people sometimes think I do because I guess I nod and smile in the right places when people are talking about them.

Anyway, I still don’t know what it is like to be a man, Philip Christman doesn’t know what it is like to be a man, but I have a feeling this guy at Andrew’s of Burbank

knows what it is like to be a man. And being a man can be awesome.

Photo by Jason Hadley, the awesomest man I know
Published in: on September 20, 2018 at 7:50 pm  Leave a Comment  
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After a few weeks of putting it off and some discussions among friends on Facebook, I finally went in for a haircut this week. I haven’t had a steady hair stylist/cutter for a long time now other than Benny; the only ones that have given me good cuts have either moved away, been too expensive if I didn’t date them or have made me self-conscious of a couple of weird lumps I have on my head. So I’ve been hopping around.

I went to a new place Thursday, and I won’t say the name of the place other than to say I didn’t get my promised-for shoulder rub. I did get a very funny fellow who kept me in stitches and made me not notice until I got in my car that he had given me a Limecat hairdo

with some Angelina Jolie from Girl, Interrupted bangs

because of course the only people who will look fabulous with those bangs are Angelina Jolie and me, a fat woman in her late forties with salt and pepper hair. So right now I look like a woman who went nuts in the country club restroom. And I have a family wedding to go to today.

But good news – I’ve found two new possible guys to try as soon as this hair grows out. Oswald and Flip. They both have similar store branding techniques, but their cutting techniques seem unique to each of them. Which one do you think?

They couldn’t bring themselves to make the obvious headline, so I guess I won’t either

My friend Tori found this notice and I think she sums it up pretty well: “In this case, the absence of a photo of the missing loved one is probably a good thing because I’m pretty sure it would make me cry. Poor Romeo. He hates being skinny and having short hair.”

It’s okay, Romeo. I just cut my hair short too. You’re probably just not used to your new ‘do – I bet you look sassy!

Published in: on September 26, 2011 at 9:44 am  Leave a Comment  
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Etiquette & superstition: baldness

I didn’t get my hair cut until I was in first grade. I suppose there must have been times in my toddlerhood when I got some sort of cursory trim to keep the hair out of my eyes, but by the time I was in kindergarten my hair was so long I could sit on it. I’m not sure what prompted my mother to urge me to cut my hair, but one afternoon in first grade, there we were, talking about how I should get my hair cut. My brother said, “You should get a bald haircut,” and thinking he was saying “balled haircut,” I agreed very enthusiastically. Balled hair. Wouldn’t that be hair that’s really curly, i.e., in the shape of balls? Sounded great. Mom said no.

ETIQUETTE: According to JP Donleavy in his etiquette guide The Unexpurgated Code, “The shiny head top condition is highly prized by some ladies. However it is true natural baldness which counts. If you are not blessed with this it is abhorrent to fake it.”

SUPERSTITION: If you want the highly prized shiny head top condition in order to attract the ladies, all you need to do is cut your hair while the moon is waning or allow a bat to fly into your coif. Your tresses will be falling out in short order. Go get ’em, Tiger.

Photo by Divine Harvester on flickr
Published in: on March 9, 2011 at 8:29 pm  Leave a Comment  
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The neck

She’s not smiling with her eyes, but with a neck like that she doesn’t have to.

Truly fierce.

Published in: on March 5, 2010 at 9:10 am  Leave a Comment  
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Ever since preschool I’ve pretty much been a bangs-and-long hair sort of girl, with few exceptions.

Here’s what happened the last time someone convinced me to get a short haircut with a “body wave” perm (as in, “It’s just going to add a little volume and body! No curl! You won’t look like a poodle! I promise you won’t look like a poodle! I promise!”):

So there you have it.

The only problem is that I’m not very good with long hair, so the default coiffure I’ve been sporting for some time has been the Bettie Page At A Desert Commune In Serious Need Of A Hot Oil Treatment look. Lately, I’ve been wondering if I should change things up a little.

I’ve been going by this hair place in Eagle Rock that seems it might have stylists with some interesting ideas:


What do you think? I’m wondering if they do complete makeovers.

Published in: on October 14, 2009 at 9:38 am  Comments (8)  
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Etiquette & superstition: dealing with stutterers

Today’s examples of etiquette and superstition fall in line with my previously written beliefs about the value of superstition over etiquette. The etiquette tip is slightly useful, in that it explains why you shouldn’t do something, but it doesn’t provide you with any answers about what to do instead. Superstition wins again with some very helpful hints.

ETIQUETTE: If you find yourself in a conversation with a person who stutters, do not finish his sentences for him or tell him to slow down and take a deep breath. It may make him self-conscious about his stuttering, which in turn can lead to more stuttering.

SUPERSTITION: An infant will develop a stutter if you cut his hair before he says his first words. Thankfully, you can cure the baby of his stutter by throwing fresh, warm reindeer lungs at him. Alternately, make the child drink water out of a snail shell for several months.

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