I have this category here called “good tooth bad tooth,” in which I normally rate dental mascots by their appeal. “Bad tooth” usually means an unfavorable tooth, most often a tooth that has its own set of teeth, but this week we have a different kind of Bad Tooth. This guy here is Baddest Man Alive, Bad Bad Leroy Brown, b-b-b-bad to the bone bad.
This tooth is being embraced by a cobra. Even though it’s turning blue at the top, I know it’s being embraced and not squeezed to death because cobras are not constrictors. And also this tooth would not allow itself to be squeezed to death. It is best friends with a cobra. It is One Bad Tooth.
My friend Princess Gorilla Suit* found this “dental office” yesterday and brought my attention to it, but she did not mention the other windows flanking Bad Ass Cobratooth.
Silver lions, ready to pounce. This place is so clearly a front for a secret society. A very dangerous secret society. Why do I suddenly feel like I’m in a Thomas Pynchon novel?