ETIQUETTE: A gift of red roses for Valentine’s Day. I don’t know; it’s traditional, but so unimaginative. If I got red roses for Valentine’s Day, I’d be a little suspicious. Try some orange roses if you want to convey passion and desire, lavender roses to mean love at first sight, or blue roses if you want the recipient to understand you find them to be an unattainable mystery… or a University of Michigan fan or something if you get the roses at FTD. FTD, why are you doing that to your roses? That’s terrible. Please stop doing that.
SUPERSTITION: So many rose superstitions. Let’s just grab a few.
- Scattered red rose petals are not a sexy, romantic gesture; they are an omen of evil to come. Also cheesy.
- If you’re going to give primroses to a farmer, make sure you give him a big bunch. If you don’t, his ducks and chickens are all going to die.
- Are you a widow being haunted by the ghost of her husband, and you just want him to go away already? Walk through a path of rose bushes four times; he will get stuck on a thorn and won’t be able to follow you any more.
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