Etiquette & superstition: bathroom activities


I had a dream last week where I was in a foreign land that mainly had squat toilets. In this dream, the place I was staying had sort of a compromise toilet for people who preferred sitting to squatting during elimination. Instead of places to put your feet while you situated yourself over the hole, there were porcelain thigh troughs indented into the ground around the hole, so you were sitting, but you were sitting on the floor. I should explain at this point that even before this dream I found the design of a squat toilet preferable to the Western-style seat toilet, but in this dream, the idea of a seat toilet was absolutely disgusting and incomprehensible. I don’t know what this means.

ETIQUETTE: Public toilets are called restrooms in the United States. Private toilets are called bathrooms. Etiquette is slightly different for each room, but basically you should remember that a restroom is a sanctuary, and a bathroom (unless it’s your own bathroom) is not your sanctuary. At a crowded party, don’t do drugs or have sex in the bathroom if there’s only one bathroom, unless you can do your drugs or have sex in less than a minute. Go find a coat closet or a side yard. In a public restroom, don’t use your cellphone. Why do I even have to say this?

SUPERSTITION: If you don’t want your newborn baby to get kidnapped by fairies, you should pee on the doorframe of your house. Fairies hate pee. Also, bubbles on the surface of your urine is a sign that you will soon get a lot of money.

Photo by levork on Flickr

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