Benny’s kids said they didn’t have any New Year’s resolutions for themselves, though they had plenty of resolutions for each other. I myself have the same resolutions every year and mostly fail at them. Maybe this year I’ll pick some new ones from Woody Guthrie’s list (click for larger version):
And you’re looking so fit! Thanks for all your hard work and see you next year, Santa.
(This is the original clip, not the one with the new soundtrack. Some tips from Neatorama: click the box that looks like a word balloon to get rid of the annotations [this version still has onscreen notes], and then click the snowflake box.)
… and maybe some cosmetic glitter that won’t cause eye irritation.
Thanks to John Ramirez and Dave Markey for the King Diamond link
I am so glad Benny took care of the Christmas decorations this year. I don’t think I could have even tackled My Drunk Kitchen’s “gingerbread” house.
That may even be a “gingerbread” “house.” Still looks like more work than I’m ready to devote right now.
Some people over at The Awl are discussing what holiday song should be crowned “Most Horrible.” It’s hard to choose; I don’t think you get to win just by being a song that’s overplayed for four weeks out of the year, or for just being a crappy rendition of a holiday classic.
Nobody’s mentioned it yet, but I think I think my choice has to be “Blue Xmas” by Miles Davis w/Bob Dorough. Doesn’t ring a bell? You know, it’s that cheery tune sung by the Schoolhouse Rock guy that goes
Geez. Just kill yourself already, Song. Even Miles Davis thought you were bullshit.
Anyway, what started this whole debate about “Most Horrible Holiday Song”? It was the original post’s assertion that Wham(!)’s “Last Christmas” should take the prize. And while I was never a George Michael fan,* I don’t think any song that has been covered 485 times can be called “Most Horrible.” Sure, some renditions are terrible, but then you have the ones that feature:
I don’t think “Blue Xmas” would translate nearly as well.
*That’s not entirely true. I did become a George Michael fan as soon as he got arrested for solicitation in that public restroom. That is a rock star.
Somehow I’m getting further and further behind with Christmas this year – everything’s sold out, shipments keep getting lost, and the butter’s gone rancid. I can’t even get to my Saturday morning cartoon until now. If things don’t start running more smoothly, my Christmas gift to you may be a be-socked feather duster with forks stuck in it.
Just look at this noble fellow that madamejujujive at the everlasting blort has found:
He’s one of several macaques photographed by Hiroshi Watanabe for his Suo Sarumawashi series. According to the original post over at My Modern Metropolis, macaques in ancient Japan:
used to don outfits and perform religious ritual dances to keep the country’s warrior horses safe. Over the thousand-year history of the ancient art, the performance has evolved into a traveling act for entertainment purposes, escaping extinction. The practice, known as Sarumawashi, is literally translated as “monkey dancing” and is one of the most popular traditional Asian performing arts these days, along with Kabuki and Noh.
And now I know what I want for Christmas – a dancing macaque to keep me safe. Is it too late to write to Santa?
There are two pictures on the outside of Guss Meat. Actually one picture rendered (hey!) by two different artists. One is sort of pastoral, with an old-fashioned truck carrying animals resigned to their fate to the abattoir:
The other one was painted by an artist with a cruder technique. The truck is more modern and sort of… drafted rather than drawn, and the distortion of the animals conveys a sort of anxious and queasy desperation that the other one does not:
Then again, when I look back at the first picture, I start to wonder if the expression on the animals’ faces is one of silent judgment rather than simple acceptance of their fate. I can’t tell. Which picture do you like better?